Lazy, hazy days of Summer...

As I sit at my desk, meditating on the year that has passed, I am almost relieved that 2022 is in the rear view mirror. A rollercoaster year that went way too fast for my liking. While it brought some great moments, it also brought difficult and challenging times for many around me.
It was a year that found us picking ourselves up and making a way back to some kind of normal. I think it caught many off guard, that the previous couple of years had impacted us all in ways we never truly understood.
Personally, it was a time of very deep reflection and many light bulb moments. Not always a pleasant journey, but one that is necessary to grow and move forward.

The year ended in a much better place for me and 2023 is shaping up to be a huge year in many avenues of my life.
Not one, but two picture books will be published this year and I am pretty excited. One in particular signifies the very beginning of my journey through the picture book world and its many twists and turns. I would not change a thing, I just wish I had been ready for this sooner and I hope to continue learning.
This year may be the time for me to step into the world of presenting workshops and bookstore visits, but for now I am studying in preparation to do the best I can.

The year is young, the weather so changeable, but I have hopes that bright and fun days are ahead. There will be rollercoasters no doubt, but I am in a good place to just hang on for the ride.

Summer days

Spring and new hope

With another turn around the globe, we find ourselves here again.
Frustration, anger and loss of focus have been my companions of late. A loner by nature, I have never felt lost in solitude, however, even I am beginning to struggle without human company so long.

In an attempt to protect my mental health, I have controlled the small part of my world that I can, limiting social media, with its triggers and banality.
For much of the 200+ days of isolation, I have found solace in my work. Being able to slip into an alternate world for a few hours a day, has certainly been a bonus. Some days, however, even the joy of creating loses its sparkle.

I feel the frustration in my neighbour's voice as she struggles to homeschool 3 kids while trying to work from home; the weariness of the worker behind the checkout, smiling and keeping us well fed;
the fear and fatigue of frontline workers can’t escape the horrors wrought by this virus.

I also see the kindness of homemade cookies, a card of friendship from afar, a voucher to feed the mind or a shared photo of a happy child. These are the things that keep me going and look forward to what I hope will be better days.

Each day I am amazed at the incredible efforts and selflessness that I see in communities pulling together, caring for those who can’t do it for themselves. These small acts of kindness remind me, much of the world still cares.

On the flip side, I am also incredibly angry to see such levels of self interest, selfishness and total lack of disregard for fellow human beings. Sadly, the human condition, and those who need to hear this message will probably never read. The human condition, those who rise and take up the fight, and those who focus on their own frivolous needs and to hell with anyone else.

As life’s journey goes on, my eyes see so much more. I need to live right now, as tomorrow is not promised.
I have no room for selfishness or lack of empathy, the world needs major healing. My small contribution of colour and light comes with love and care for whoever needs its balm.

It has been a tough road but there is light in the bursting spring flowers, warm sunlight and perhaps some release for us all.

Disconnected in a connected world

For some time I have been feeling uneasy and frustrated, some days more jarring than others… yesterday was one of those days.

Faced with the rollercoaster ride that is the pandemic, here in Melbourne, we find ourselves in lockdown once again. Five days is not so bad, if it stops this scourge in its track. We are fortunate to face such a minor impact compared to countries across the globe. I look forward to the day when the world is vaccinated, bringing a little more calm and freedom for everyone, not just the privileged.

As I speak to close friends, it would appear that we are still suffering from the psychological scars of last year’s 3 month hard lockdown. While many having been going about their lives more ‘normally’, there are still many of us who approach being out and about with caution and care. Having had previous, underlying health issues, I really would prefer not to tempt fate.

Weary of the blame game and the incessant need of the media (and other keyboard warriors) to criticise all and sundry, I appreciate the frustration and human need for answers, however, I also see clearly, that this epidemic doesn’t discriminate and no one person can provide the solution.

Lately, I also find myself distancing more and more from social media. It is a wonderful place to share creative achievements and celebrate our lives and loves, but it is also a place of angst, misinformation and for me personally, way too much oversharing.

While I love to cheer on my online friends, I am rapidly learning to snooze people due to the constant need to overshare every minute detail of their lives. I understand people need to feel connected, some may feel anxious and others just need to know someone is listening, but some days, too much is just way too much.

I have put myself in a little social media time out, devoting my solitude to creative projects and rejuvenation of myself the best way I know how… drawing, reading and a little interlude of Netflix. (Once again proving that we cannot exist with the creative arts!)

Here’s hoping this latest short, sharp circuit breaker will return us to a little more calm life. Keep well all my friends across the world.

Life from a different perspective.

2020, the year that was mind-blowing on too many levels to grasp. Virus, lockdowns, economic and political upheaval everywhere you look. As we reflect on the new year, the light at the end of the tunnel is blurry and often difficult to see.

2021 heralds the dawn of Aquarius, a time of upheaval and great change from what we have known. It promises worldwide realignment with things that really mean something to us as a collective human race. Personally, I will try to maintain a positive outlook, in hope that the majority can bring this calmer, kinder world into being.

While keeping up to date with world events and daily news, I have learned quickly, to filter the sensationalism and misinformation. My solace in creativity buffers me from times of long isolation, conflict and mankind’s cruelty and hatred, all of which weigh heavily on this empath.
I have also come to terms with the fact that not everyone sees the world as I see it. My expectations of myself are high and perhaps I have expected the same of others. Moving forward into this new year, I move with no expectation of anything or anyone and am simply content to take each day as it comes.

Our path to recovery will be long and often stalled, but the pragmatist in me knows that this too shall pass. Things may never be the same again, but in many instances this may not be such a bad thing. Our world needs to be a little slower, kinder and we, as a human race, more conscious of the impact of word and deed.

Planet Earth is crying out for change before it is too late and we need to answer her call.

All things Evie and Iso fatigue.

All aboard the COVID rollercoaster. Here in Melbourne we are halfway through a second wave, hard lockdown and we are all feeling isolation fatigue. As much of the country move back toward a modified normality, our southern state is feeling the mental and physical barriers of the lockdown. In and out of lockdown since March this year, our resolution to get on top of this is strong. We are fighting hard to get case numbers down, but some days it feels as if the rest of the country have forgotten just how lockdown feels.

With minimal movement outside the home and greatly reduced business and industry, most people are doing what needs to be done. However, despite the risk and rising death toll, there are still those ignoring warnings and others choosing to ignore the pandemic altogether, a baffling notion.
Would world governments tank their economies and restrict the movement of people for the fun of it or for control? I think not.

It is certainly no picnic. Those of us living alone are missing the hugs and company of friends and family; families with children are coping with homeschooling and lack of space from one another and the elderly are isolated, many falling victim to this scourge that does not discriminate.
We cannot forget the overwhelming and heavy burden on our frontline health workers, essential services and those working to keep the rest of us safe. Thank you will never be enough for these people who have no choice but to fight.

Spending a great deal of time in isolation heightens the sense of disconnection and sadness for many of us.
I am fortunate to be working on my next picture book, which has provided me with a daily escape into a magical world.

Spring is peeking out from behind the flowering trees and in new plant growth. In between wintery blasts of Antarctic air and heavy rain bursts, I have been trying to do my annual clean up for the coming good weather. Add to that, baking, crocheting hand mitts and making an Evie for our Evie is all Ears book launch later in the year, I am keeping myself entertained. When it all gets too much, I drop on the couch for a little Netflix binge.

The mail service is slower than walking at the moment. Due to reduction in sorting centre staff and being sent to Sydney for sorting then back to Melbourne for distribution. Some mail is travelling over 1500km to get back to where it came from initially! Crazy times.
I am chaffing at the bit, waiting for the arrival of my first copy of Evie is all Ears. After working on her story for the past 2 years, this homestretch is getting very long. There are much worse things that can happen and I will be patient…
I am trying hard to stay positive, ignoring the negativity of social media, media in general and the lunatic fringe. We have been through so many trials in 2020, but we will get through this too.

Keep safe and well all, until we can be together again. x

Creativity in uncertain times

I recently completed work on my first children’s picture book for publishers Little Pink Dog Books. It is a highlight in a time where the world is being forced to stop and take stock. A time for us all to reflect on what we have created and how much we have inflicted on our planet. Lockdown or isolation is not an unusual situation for creatives to find themselves. By the nature of our work, we most often work in isolation.
I guess, the fact that we can’t really go out into the world if we choose is the kicker at present. But I hope we all emerge with greater compassion and empathy for the world around us and every living creature in it.

A watershed moment for me, publication of this book has brought me full circle in realising a lifelong ambition. I have been fortunate to be able to make a living from the graphic design field, my heart, however, has never been truly connected. As a young artist, I began my journey immersed in canvas and oil paint, but very quickly realised that I needed to diversify if I was to survive in the economic buzz of the early 1980s.

I chose design as a career at a time when it required great artistic and artisan capability. Long before computer software and digital processes began to chip away at these skills. At the time, this satisfied my creativity and general curiosity. I dabbled briefly in illustration work for YA publishing and kept my artistic self content with painting and photography on the side.

As the digital revolution emerged, I embraced all its benefits, slowly replacing hard-honed manual skills.
I did, and still do, view computers and software programs as just another tool, not unlike my brushes and graphic pens. The true design skill is still the creative mind.

I grieve for the skills lost and the misguided belief that, just because you can use software makes you a good designer. But I am buoyed by the fact, that many of those manual, artisan skills are enjoying a massive resurgence. There are some amazing designers in today’s industry, but there are also a great deal who just ‘churn and burn’ as we used to say in commercial studios.

Fast-forward 30+ years and my creative soul had become well and truly battered by the day to day monotony of the modern design world. My young artist was crying for help and a raft of personal trials and upheavals created a catalyst for me to finally say enough!

By chance (and just a little social networking), my journey finally led me to free that young artist. No longer averse at revealing my creative soul to the world, I embraced her, gave her a hug and said, “we can do this girl”.
Current endeavours may not be filling the coffers, but I am truly content at where I have come to rest.
An ‘overnight success’ 40 years in the making. I am happy to see where this road takes me when we are finally able to go back out into the changed (for the better I hope) world. Stay well and keep creating.

All Hallows, travels and living the dream...

As we fast approach the time when the veil is thinnest on the eve of Samhain or All Hallows, everyone is dressing in kooky costumes and temperatures are on the rise here in the southern hemisphere. I reflect on the past few months which have been a blur of activity, and oh what a ride it has been!

Firstly, I was very fortunate to revisit a place that has always been a gem in my artist’s eye… Venice.
Spending three wonderful days living in, exploring the winding laneways and loving the quieter side of the beautiful canal city.
I also experienced first time cruising through the Adriatic and Mediterranean seas, visiting Croatia and the Greek Isles with my Canadian travel bestie. What a fabulous experience. Waking to the gentle swish of the ocean and balmy summer breezes definitely recharged my Piscean soul. So many amazing places and experiences I will treasure for ever and such a delight for a artist/photographer’s eye.

In the past few months I have been working hard on a children’s picture book, the first of three commissions for the wonderfully supportive and unique publisher Little Pink Dog Books. I am chafing at the bit to share a little of the journey, but everything is secret squirrel for the moment. I am so happy with the results thus far and can’t wait to let a few of those images loose very soon.

As the silly season is fast approaching, I can’t help but think how very different this year has been for me.
I am living my dream that has been with me from my childhood. As I sat on my Mama’s knee while she read so many beautiful books to me, images of characters twirled in my head, just itching to be brought to life. Always my biggest champion, I wish she could see how far I have come. I know she is with me always and can see her proud smile in my mind’s eye.

I have waited a long time to live my authentic life as an artist. The journey has taken me to many places, dark and light, but it has all been in preparation for these incredible times ahead, for which I am well and truly ready and thankful.
So much work still to do and so many people to catch up with and share stories. I have learned to make time for it all and let unnecessary stress fall by the way. Finally, I can say that I am content Mama. x

Early morning Venice - Gondolas on the Grand Canal.

ChChChaaanges...

Wow, never a truer song was written. Thanks for the reminder Mr Bowie. Life is full of change and no matter how much we resist, it is inevitable. A lesson I am learning very rapidly.

Barely are we into the year and my life has changed… and changed again. After a few months foray back into the regular working world, I find myself here again contemplating what is ahead for me. The universe is ever-so-slightly reminding me to be true to self, 6 score years revolving on the planet, you would think that I would realise that by now.

It has been a hectic few months with many highs and lows and I find myself in a mental limbo at present. A little hesitant to push myself, more content to sit and listen to my creative inner child who will eventually create some form of rebellion if I ignore her for too long.

My picture book publishing project has been taking a back seat for the past few months due to everyday work stresses and a lack of energy. But as fate has stepped in and redirected my thoughts, once again I am back at the drawing board, dreaming, working hard and receiving wonderful encouragement and support from my author and publisher.
A much needed daily boost now comes in the form of like-minded artists and entrepreneurs in an online initiative called Project Portfolio. It is the brainchild of picture book tutor, Nina Rycroft and brings together a wide variety of creative professionals and artists who share their experiences in a creative community. My arty mojo is feeling nurtured and inspired once more.

I need to learn to listen to my instincts and trust that things will work out. No matter whether good things or bad come my way, I know to wait for a moment as things always change.

Proud to be a part of this fantastic networking event for creatives across the globe.

The Year of the Boar... or should I say Phoenix!

This time last year, I had no inkling of just how quickly my life would transform. I was working my way out of a lengthy and painful physical recovery period, trying to find my way back into a world I had walked away from a couple of years prior. Family loss, retrenchment, life threatening illness and sheer burnout had taken its toll on my creative spirit.

But as my body was healing physically, my inner self was preparing itself to re-enter the working world, this time with a different attitude. No sweating the small stuff or buying into the politics of working life. I was rediscovering my spirit through working on my children’s picture book, slowly building confidence and finding that I was needing more. Working and living in isolation can sometimes drive you crazy, not to mention barking dogs and noisy neighbourhoods. My search began for a job that would help me pay the bills but still allow me to pursue my illustrative dream of publishing my picture book.

As most who are in the job search market know, it is incredibly tough out there. I have a long list of skills and accomplishments from my design career, but just getting a response from many of the companies was as rare as the proverbial hen’s teeth. Undaunted, a tiny bit frustrated, I continued the search and in the latter part of the year, applied, interviewed and landed a new job within a week. Now I found myself back in the old ‘Mach 10 with my hair on fire’ way of living.

Not long after I started working I was offered an illustrator’s dream. I had done all the groundwork, created my illustrative website, introduced myself to a few niche publishers, joined the ASA Style file and continued with private commissions. I received contact from a niche Australian Children’s book publisher who liked my work and was interested in matching me with one of their authors. Within the space of 2 weeks I had read the manuscript, combed through the contract and signed on the dotted line to work on my first published children’s picture book.

What a Christmas present! I was somewhere between excited and terrified, but I am in for the ride.

I miss the time I used to have to formulate my illustrative attack plan and the luxury of doing what I choose when I choose, but it is nice to be out in the world again, earning a living and supporting my creative passions.
My return to full time work as a Graphic designer was not an easy decision, but the benefits are a little more security for the time when I finally give up working for the man. That time will be totally given up to my two passions, travel and illustration.

In the meantime, I am back doing what I do best and juggling numerous creative and personal projects in the air.
The planning and preparation for the new book is well underway and I am sure there are fun times ahead.

It is the Year of the Boar, my astral birth sign, a year of a very big birthday and a year that my spirit rises from the ashes and soars towards an exciting future.

Am I an extraverted introvert?

Those who know me, see an often whacky, outward personality. However, not too far beneath the surface lurks the shy little girl who could often be found quietly entertaining herself. Raised to be humble, I am just beginning to realise introversion has always been in my DNA.

I am currently reading a book titled Quiet – The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain, and I can’t help thinking to myself, Yes! Yes! Yes!

For years I thought I was just being sensitive to the cacophony of sound in the workplace, the arrogance, constant self promotion and the me, me, me! Don’t get me wrong, if that is what floats your boat, all power to you. It goes against my grain, and that is ok too.

Much of my professional work life has been in marketing, an industry that thrives on being larger than life, loud and brash, an irony which is not lost on me.
I have managed to carve myself a small creative niche, but as the world becomes more global and even louder, I finally realise why I have always felt so unsettled.

Loud, grating voices, intrusive mobiles, noise and big personalities, things that often drive me crazy, when all I really want is a quiet space to think. My brain isn’t wired to filter this mishmash of noise and as I read this book I am beginning to understand why.

Society would like us to believe that to be successful we all need to be team-oriented, loud and competitive, some of this I can do, but most of it leaves me cold. I loathe open plan offices and the constant ‘we must work as a team philosophy’. Some of us are simply more productive when left to our own devices in a quiet space. After years working in busy environments I can hold my own, but it is definitely not my natural working state and often leaves my soul drained.

I can lose a day in my drawing and painting, and manage to disconnect from much external interference. It is in these moments of immersion my best work emerges. It may have taken me half a lifetime to realise, but there is nothing wrong with wanting to work in the background, there are more than enough extraverts in the world to pick up the slack.

The further I read into this insightful book, the more I am learning to be content in my own skin.
I no longer beat myself up about not wanting to be up in the mix. The time and space I have to myself is helping me to become a stronger, more prolific artist.